Today is a gift! PDF Print E-mail
Image"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift, that's why they call it the present." Last year at this time my daughter Laurie was diagnosed with non-hodgins' lymphoma. My daughter and I have always had a 'push pull relationship. Ironically it often emulated the one I have with my own mother.

I have had years of training in stress management and positive psychology, but family dynamics often unfold in ways that are very difficult to navigate. I have seen a family crisis create healing and forgiveness throughout my years of teaching. Well, lo and behold, it was our turn. Just before my daughter called with the news of her diagnosis, I was sitting thinking about how much I had to do that day and essentially doing what I tell others not to do. I was pre-suffering. Worrying about stuff that hadn't even happened yet. How many of us waster precious moments of our lives, exhausting ourselves over moments that have not yet arrived? Ninety percent of what we worry about never comes true.

My daughter and I have become the best of friends, I am her health advocate. She is a patient at Dana Farber and at our last visit she was told things looked good. We now go every six months for a check up and pray in between that all continues to be well.

The gift we received from this bump in the road is how close we are now and how much more mindful we have become of the moments in our lives. I have gotten involved in fundraising for the Leukemia foundation and will help kick off their walk in Boston on October 4th.I also created a bracelet in her honor which states " Lice juicy,Live joyful", part of the proceeds will go to the foundation. She has become an advocate and role model for inner peace and happiness and now reminds me when I obsess to "let it go". We have in essence discovered "the bless in the mess". I look forward to your stories and how you have come to realize that we have precious little time to waste on grudges, grievances, minor irritations, or any thing that really doesn't matter. Loretta

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Gary Stevens said:

  I saw you at the remax awards banquet. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. We are all day to day and don't appreciate it. I preach that, but still apparently needed you to remind me. Thanks for the prospective.
March 31, 2008

lesley hartwell said:

  I had a fabulous time at the Vancouver seminar, you were a new name to me and Im thrilled to have experienced some of your insights. I laughed all my make up off yesterday, I never put it on properly anyway!!! We have been quoting you all day at the Salon and we are definately very JUICY today. Thank you Loretta for a wonderful day
March 06, 2008

Crystal Wilson said:

  I just got home from what I can only described as the most amazing first day to the rest of my new life. I could not wait to see Loretta in person. I have seen her in her seminars on tape and tv but never live and it was worth the wait. She inspired me to leave each day and no matter what comes my way... laugh, smile and be grateful that I was given another day to do it all over again.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I look forward to all amazing things to come.

Crystal from Vancouver
March 05, 2008

Wendy Porter said:

  Loretta, what can I say, you absolutely rock!! I saw you in Halifax yesterday and loved your presentation. I am a firm believer in using humor to overcome life's stressors. Being a single mom for most of my children's lives is something I now cherish as really it could have been much worse, I could have stayed with their father. We have had many laughs over some of my more memorable stressed out times and what I did to prevent me from either giving away my children or jumping in the car and driving away laughing manically. I am sure the neighbours questioned this wild woman walking around and around her house muttering dire threats. But we also remember times where we would just lay down and look at each other and laugh for no reason other than the joy of laughing and that we could. I can see now in my grown children the ability to use laughter to defuse a stressful situation for them and the strength and compassion to share that with others who struggle.

People have always said to me "You are always laughing." seeming quite puzzled over my humor. My response has always been "It's a lot better than crying and it makes me feel good".

Thank you again, it was wonderful to listen to you and take away your humor in life, I am still smiling today.

Wendy :)
February 27, 2008

Effie said:

  I've seen Loretta a couple of times here in Toronto with PowerWithin...her humour never ceases to bring me up! We are all so stressed, running around like hamsters on a wheel...and why? Loretta, you're so right...we need to laugh more, appreciate ourselves more...'cuz stress can kill you. Three years ago, I suffered a ruptured brain aneurysm while on a business trip...and almost died. I'm one of the lucky few that recovered completely...only 5% do so...'cuz I had climbed the 'corporate ladder' and was working myself (almost) to death...Your books and tapes always make me laugh....my Mediterranean relatives think we're all crazy here 'cuz 'we live to work' as they say....laugh, enjoy it...you don't know how long your ride is (I certainly didn't)...so have fun!

Love ya' Loretta! Keep teaching us to laugh!

Effie
February 06, 2008

Ludlow Diane said:

  I recently purchased "How to be a Wild, Wise and Witty Woman" and I want to thank you for it. I was feeling sorry for myself after the breakup of an 18 year relationship that should have only lasted for 3 years! The CD's made me put things in perspective with humor. I listened to them at home and in the car on the way to work. One morning as I was going out the door, I thought about which tape to bring, but I was late so I decided to go without the CD, that I would just think on my ride to work. Then a thought in my weak brain said, "You can't do that, you're not allowed to think alone!" The next thing I heard was me..... and you laughing histerically. Thank you for getting in my head! Thank you for the helping hand to pull me out of my dark hole. I'm a work in progress.
January 21, 2008

Pat Wiley Shafer said:

  Dear Loretta,
I've been slowly coming out of limbo since my husband died 8 years ago, and I was flattened with recurring shingles. That went on and on and on! During that time I was introduced to your Humor work through your videos in the Commission on Aging library! Thank you! Laughing sure helps kick some life into the old immune system!
You and your daughter are in my prayers. Daily.
Love,
Pat
January 01, 2008

PJ Bahr said:

  Thank you so very sincerely for your transparency, your encouragement, your humor. I was diagnosed with M.S. about 12 years ago and it has been life-changing for me and my family. We don't sweat the small stuff as much as we used to. I was always so concerned (obsessed) about my appearance. Now when I run to the store with no makeup on, wearing sweat pants and an old tee, I figure if someone sees me looking horribly, then the NEXT time they see me and I have makeup on and look GREAT, they'll think I'm really getting BETTER with age! :) I haven't yet gone to the front door wearing only my husband's shoes, but that story you relate of yourself greeting your husband at the door wearing only his wingtipped shoes got a HUGE laugh at my bible study yesterday!!! I've read only one of your books so far........ and am planning on reading anything that has your name on it. THANK YOU again for being "real" and allowing us to share a part of your life with you. I've been tremendously blessed by you. In love, PJ
December 30, 2007

Laura Hurvitz said:

  Hi Loretta,

Last year I was diagnosed with Chronic Leukemia and I am also a patient at Dana Farber. I would love to join in your efforts to raise money for the cause. Please let me know how I can help! I feel the need to find a way to give back. I am very grateful for my current health status & pray it continues!

Your tapes make me smile & realize not to worry about the things I can't control. Thanks for being you!!!

Best regards,
Laura
November 18, 2007

Kathleen McCuistion said:

  Loretta, may dear mom loved you and your humor. Because of that I bought some of your videos. Tonight I pulled out "Humor Your Stress." My husband and I chortled thru dinner. I plan to put the video in circulation at church. So many people have problems and feel so alone. I know even you probably do at times. But your example of humor is infallible. It is a sure-fire ameliorent to physical and spirtual suffering--e.g. Norman Cousins' ANATOMY OF AN ILLNESS. God bless you. Kathleen
November 03, 2007

Tammy Daniels said:

  My sister and I both suffer from chronic pain and disabling fatigue. Sometimes life becomes such a chore that it seems it would be a blessing to just not wake up some morning. We both use humor as much as possible to keep going even if other people think we are nuts.
October 10, 2007

LAUREEN GRADY-ROBINSON said:

  I SAW LORETTA IN PERSON SEVERAL TIMES IN THE EARLY 90'S AND HER "HUMOR" PRESENTATION WAS EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED AT THAT TIME.. AND HER WORDS, PHILOSOPHIES AND HUMOR HAS STOOD ME IN GOOD STEAD ALL THESE YEARS.

I AM A 8 YEAR BREAST CANCER SURVIVOR AND NOW I AM ON ANOTHER SURVIVAL JOURNEY WITH LUNG CANCER AND 9 YEARS AGO MY HUSBAND WAS KILLED IN AN AUTOMOBILE ACCIDENT....AND I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW INSTRUMENTAL HER ROUTINE ABOUT "KICKING THE COMMITTEE MEMBERS OFF THE BUS"....YOU KNOW THOSE VOICES IN YOUR HEAD THAT SAY ALL THOSE NEGATIVE THINGS TO US, THOSE ARE THE "COMMITTEE MEMBERS. HAS BEEN FOR ME. THAT PROCESS OF BEEN ONE OF THE MAJOR SURVIVAL TACTICS THAT I HAVE BEEN USING ALL THESE YEARS....

I WILL BE FOREVER GRATEFUL!!!!!!

LAUREEN
October 03, 2007

Maria Tamborelli said:

  I just want to say "Thank You" to you for bringing these important messages to us. We should not have to be reminded, but we do. You a such a inspiration to us all and funny to boot! I cannot wait to see you at South County Hospital on October 13th forthe Women's Wellness Day. The last time I saw you was about ten years ago (too long ago), but I must say I do have tapes and my husband loves to listen to them in the car as well. I can only wish I had the sense of humor you do and not be so serious about everything~ God Bless You Loretta. See you soon and I can't wait to laugh away with my best friend.

Maria
September 28, 2007

OvarianDiane said:

  14 Years ago I was diagnosed with advanced ovarian cancer. One afternoon while taking a nap with the TV on I awoke to hear rauckus laughter. You were on PBS with your program "Humor your Stress". I can't begin to tell you how helpful that program was to me. I honestly don't remember if this was during the time I was undergoing treatment or while I was in the limbo state that followed. But I do know a lot of what you said helped me. I put something on our ovarian list back in 1996. "she says, 'a wet towel on the bed is not a mugging'. I've changed that to 'whatever is aggravating me isn't cancer'."

Today someone on our list mentioned how helpful laughter was in relieving stress and I remembered seeing the PBS specials. I searched the web and found your site and learned about your daughter's diagnosis. I just wanted to write and let you know how helpful you were to me during that time in my life and how special the last 14 years have been for me and to thank you for helping me get back my life.
Sincerely
Diane
September 26, 2007

Lee Ann Price said:

  Thank you for another reminder as to how important it is to appreciate what we've got at present. The funny thing is that as self-aware as we are - we will still do the very things that we tell others not to do. Thank goodness you have your daughter as your partner as you both continue on your journeys to self awareness. I started my self-awareness journey last December when a partner who I took on to save my struggling business - turned south on me and imploded it instead. My business was gone and I became the defendant in lawsuits that resulted from that failed business that I now have to declare personal bankruptcy.
I decided that rather than be angry and bitter - I needed to use that energy to become more self-aware. It's been a fantastic journey. Not easy - but well worth it. And you have now become part of my faculty in my school of self-learning. You state that you admired Erma Bombeck in your book and to that end - I admire you. You are admirably carrying on in her footsteps to use the gift of laughter to our advantage.
September 16, 2007

Brenda Jong said:

  Way to go Loretta.
I had not spoken with my Mom for 6 months, when I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer.
That was eleven years ago. We had always been close and the diagnosis brought us even closer
and destroyed the rift that we had been sufferring through.
I was diagnosed with a recurrence last month and my Mom is still there for me as well as the rest of the family.

My prognosis is great and my whole family is brought closer by these unfortunate episodes.
It's too bad that the rest of the time LIFE gets in the way of living and enjoying each other's company,
as we never know when it will be gone for good.

Brenda
September 02, 2007

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